HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SUMMER!
Here is my sentence from a MG novel I currently call The Kings of Time Trilogy: Book 1 (please don't ask me how many books there are--whenever I start writing anything it gets longer . . . and longer . . . and longer):
I hopped into the boat and Axe slid in next to me.
And here is a sentence straight off the top of my head about a girl who lands in a marketing office due to a rip in spacetime (I always wanted to write a book on rips in spacetime--so much possibility!):
When my feet hit the carpet and I heard astonished gasps, I knew something had happened--and I knew immediately that it was going to be strange.
I'm afraid I will not be around to your blogs today, so I won't be coming up in the comment threads--Wednesdays are a mess for me. So I won't be visiting the other blogfesters, either, until tomorrow. (I still have to check out the Show Me Yours blogfest people . . .)
But anyways, if you're part of the New Creation, do comment and tell me so I can get around to your entry! :)
-----The Golden Eagle
32 comments:
Love the new sentence!!! :)
Good writing.
You left a subtle but nice cliff hanger at the end of your first sentence.
The second is sounds fun and opens the mind to many possibilities.
Michael
Hi,
1) Fast finish, yet good hook line for sequel!
2) Touch of Life on Mars etc., and great opening! ;)
best
F
Great sentences- so many have written first person! I really enjoyed your new line- it sounds like you can really go somewhere with it. thank you fairy much for the birthday wishes and participating!
I really like the new sentence.
Both are interesting sentences that make one wonder about the rest of the stories.
Mason
Thoughts in Progress
Love the creations and I have that same problem; longer and longer :)
Don't worry, just do what you have to do :D
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
The first one sounds full of hope, I like it very much. I love the thought of arriving out of time and into an office! Great charm in the writing.
Sentence 1 sounds like a hopeful quiet ending.
Sentence 2 is absolutely fabulous!! It's a most wonderful start and grabbed my attention asap! Take care
x
uh... usually, in a trilogy, there are three books ;)
Oooh, write about the girl and rip in space time. Very cool.
Hope your wednesday isn't too overhwelming.
The new sentence was a lot of fun. Of course, aren't things always strange in marketing offices. :)
Great opener, hope you write it.
Oooooo...rips in spacetime, now you're speaking my language! Love it! What an intriguing place for the fractured continuum to put somebody *laugh* I guess it's better than landing at the IRS? or in line at the DMV? Good stuff!
~bru
I love this blogfest, how fun! I especially like your second one, probably because I have a particular interest in sci-fi myself! Both sound like great stories!
I love your lines. Especially the second one. I'm posting mine to be scheduled tomorrow, as I won't be online during the day. :O)
As yo may have guessed, I love fabric ripping portals and space time adventures. Your opening sentence is nice too.
Nancy
N. R. Williams, fantasy author
I could tell you intended to take your reader somewhere else in that boat. (I worried about taking an Axe in a boat though ;))
The seconded sounded young and that mixture of amazed and excited - are you aiming it for MG readers?
Great sentences! Nice to meet you...
Both great sentences. The first has me intrigued to know more and the second made me laugh. A love the premise behind your story.
Nice!
Last Sentence: gives the feel of a part of the protag's life being over now, the boat being a transition to a new life
First Sentence: strange indeed, lol!
Thanks for sharing,
Sash.
Very nice. I'm curious what sentence two will be.
I find the first one intriguing, and the second one just very exciting. Who wouldn't want to hear more about a rip in space/time? Glad to have found you. Good luck with your crazy Wednesday!
~ Bess
Coming by for the Blogfest to check out the sentences... nice work on each!
Great lines! Now I'm curious about the story behind that last line.
Nice character introduction in the first; the second has me on the edge of my seat.
Well done GoldE.
..........dhole
Pk: Glad you like it! :)
Elena: Thank you!
Angela: Thanks!
Michael: Thanks for sharing your thoughts! :)
Francine: Thank you!
I love Life on Mars stuff. :P
Summer: I noticed that as well! But I like 1st person generally, so I don't mind it.
I plan to go places with those rips in spacetime. :D
You're welcome! Thank you for hosting this blogfest, Summer!
Quinn: I'm glad you like it!
Mason: They'll probably change in the end, but for now they're what have!
Jules: Glad you like them! :)
I try. LOL.
Margo: The character is hopeful at that point in the story!
Thank you!
Old Kitty: Thanks for the feedback! :)
Laughingwolf: It's a working title, and I don't plan on going beyond a trilogy. But I always end up going beyond the limits I set. :P
Carol: Thank you! I'll get to her after I write finish the other novel I'm working on . . .
Charles: Thanks. It wasn't terrible--just meant the whole day was spent out of town.
Erin: Exactly what I was thinking. :D
Wendy: I probably will--I'm trying to hold back the flood of ideas at the moment, since I'm working on another project! :P
Bru: LOL. Yes, it is better than landing one of those places!
Heather: Thanks! I'm a SF lover as well.
Madeleine: I wasn't around on Wednesday, either! Bad day of the week for blogging, I guess.
Nancy: Thanks! I love it because the science can be just as fun as wands and magic. :D
Elaine: *grins* Axe is a pretty nice character, all in all--wild at times, but he wouldn't destroy a boat on purpose.
I intent it to be for YA, although the sentence does sound like a little like MG, doesn't it? Hmmm. I'll have to think about that one!
Margo: Thank you!
It was nice to "meet" you, too!
Ellie: Thanks! Glad you like the sentences!
Sash: Thanks!
It is kind of a metaphor--he's about to start a new part of the journey.
You're welcome!
Holly: I'm planning on awesomeness.
LOL. We'll just have to see!
Bess: I know I can't resist Science Fiction!
Thank you! It went well.
Danette: Thanks for coming by! :)
Julie: I've got plans for it, that's for sure!
Donna: Thank you! And thanks for commenting.
I couldn't make much of the ending. The beginning has possibilities - what's gaspworthy or strange about feet hitting a carpet?
I joined New Beginnings late, but I'd love to hear what you think of my sentences.
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